Surprise! You have diarrhea!
Day 103:Arizona
As tempting as it was to stay longer in the amazing hot bed of vice and sin we had to get a hustle on back to Texas for Christmas. I was looking forward to my first Christmas in America, despite the fact I didn’t eat turkey I’m sure it was going to be a great traditional time of the year! We said goodbye to Chad through the bathroom door (Leon was off hiking again somewhere) and took the interstate back through the heart of Darkness to the freedom of the desert. We had to negotiate the Hoover Dam once again which was gridlocked with people desperate to get away from Vegas. Helicopters filled the skies overhead like carcinogenic belching dragonflies, $28 a flight the signs proclaimed but when you got there it was really $58 to see the dam. I can imagine the childrens tears as their daddy tells them he’s too cheap to spend another $30! We sat in the jam practicing my terrible Spanish over the buzzing of the propellers.
The previous time we didn’t get to look down the edge of the dam but this time we got out to have a look. It was even more disappointing up close, the place is just a giant power plant, grey buildings everywhere and crawling with tourists who can’t seem to walk more than 2 miles an hour. Get out of my way! We took the obligatory photos and got back onto the now miraculously clear interstate back east. No ghost towns this time, we just drove and drove. No time to stop, just a few minutes to refuel on gas and coffee… go go go… mid-day, afternoon, sunset, we went on and on. In some random town I was starting to get hungry and spotting a pizza place I made the stupid mistake of suggesting we eat there. It wasn’t a chain, it must be good yeah? Rays pizza, they had a veggie one so we were happy. When it arrived I wolfed the first slice down, it really hit the spot. On the second slice I actually looked at what we were eating. Canned olives. Ok…Pineapple, sure….. Canned Mushrooms… hmmmm, no surprise but ok….Canned Green Peppers….?? Wtf. Who the hell puts canned peppers on pizza. I forced another 2 slices down but my heart wasn’t in it. The town was called ‘Surprise’ and the pizza was surprisingly dire. The Mexican stuff in Dallas was better by a factor of 5 even if it took them another try without the sausages. Rays Pizza surprise, you get 3 out of 10!
We tore through Phoenix and Tucson without stopping and ended up stopping at the desert Inn in a place called Willcox at 1.30am in the morning. I didn’t even check for wifi, we just collapsed into bed, at least we only had about 5 hours the next day….
Tags: Travel, power plant, tourists, sunset, grey buildings, beds, olives, photos, canned mushrooms, obligatory photos, pizza place, ghost towns, deserts, green peppers, heart of darkness, hot bed